Rhubarb Crumble

I love rhubarb -- anything sour, really. It is delicious. I saw some great looking rhubarb at the store the other day and could not resist. It was smooth, bright pink, fresh and tender. I made up this easy recipe as I went, and it turned out delicious!

Rhubarb Crumble

1 lb. fresh rhubarb, chopped into 1 inch pieces
1/2 c. sugar

Crumble topping:
3/4 c. oats
3/4 c. flour
1/2 c. brown sugar
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 tsp. salt
4 tbsp. shortening of choice -- I used butter, but could have easily just used oil or anything else

Assembly is pretty easy. Spray 9"x9" casserole (or whatever pan you have) with non-stick spray. Put rhubarb into casserole, dump sugar on top, and toss. In separate bowl, mix together ingredients for crumble. If using butter, crumble it in as you would for biscuits, but if using oil, just mix. This crumble recipe makes a little extra topping (can be used for variety of other things another time). Distribute crumble over top of rhubarb and bake at 350 degrees F for 25-30 minutes. Eat.

I suppose you could have this with vanilla ice cream, yogurt, or milk, but the smell of it's deliciousness kept me from doing any of these things. I just ate. Enjoy!

Love from a distance

Relationships are so complicated, and long-distance dating makes it even harder. When your partner is far away, it brings out every dumb insecurity that you ever had in relationships.. like, does he like me as much as I like him? Does he like me too much? Does he understand me? Even though my boyfriend gives me no reason to doubt him -- he always brings me thoughtful gifts when he comes to visit, sometimes sends me sweet packages, and we have such great talks on the phone -- I still sometimes find myself wondering if he could possibly care about me as much as he says, or if I really love him or if I'm just holding on because he is the only constant in my life while everything else is changing. I admit, the last time I visited him, I felt a little detached emotionally, as if sex was the only thing we had in common any more. Not that we didn't have fun hanging out, but I found myself wondering if it was really worth the drive or if I was just holding on for other reasons. That is horrible. He is wonderful. I think I was just feeling a little insecure because this love thing is so new to me, and sometimes he doesn't say those three words quite often enough. I did not mention this to him, but I think he could tell something was up. He's been telling me he loves me a lot more now, which does make me feel better actually. Is that stupid?

But, now that he's saying it more often, it also makes me miss him more, which is another reason that I had allowed myself to feel detached sometimes (easier emotionally to not be longing for him all the time). He was supposed to come visit next weekend as part of a business/family visit trip, but now he probably won't be able to come my way because of the way the business aspect of his trip has worked out. This makes me sad. In fact, I've already cried about it more than once. Am I crazy? I'm not normally a crier, but he just seems to bring it out in me. Without this coming weekend, we won't be able to get together until Easter at the earliest -- a full month since the last time we saw each other. Does anyone out there have tips or suggestions for how to keep the love alive from a distance and not lose your mind? I could sure use some help in that department.

Love and Tiny Steaks with Mushroom Sauce

I am in love, and have been happily so for a little while now.. my boyfriend is truly wonderful in every possible way, and I find myself with crazy thoughts of settling down in my head. The only problem is, we don't live in the same place. I don't particularly like living in Small Town so far, but I do love my new job here. I really miss my bf all the time though, and that makes me wonder about going back to City A, but it seems so early to make a drastic decision like that.. argh. Love is wonderful, but slightly frustrating. In fact, it was when he was visiting one weekend in Small Town, and I had a brief little cry about his impending departure back to the city that he said those magical words.. "I love you". That was several weeks ago now, and it is one of the only things I can think about lately. He is smart, thoughtful, ambitious, caring, kind, funny, sensitive, has the same values as me, and cares about the same things. We even sit at the breakfast table together sometimes, listening to NPR, and gazing into each others' nerdy/misty eyes. We are complete nerds, and I love him for it, and he loves me. Sigh. I'm going to see him again this weekend.

On another topic, I made an awesome dinner last night -- so delicious, and very economical! What you need: very thin-sliced round steaks (super cheap), mushrooms, milk, potatoes, butter, kale, garlic, red pepper flakes.

Tiny Steaks with Mashed Potatoes & Mushroom Gravy, and Sauteed Kale

In order for everything to be ready at the same time, you'll want to start with the potatoes -- clean them up, chop into even-sized pieces, and place in a small pot with cold water and plenty of salt. The quantity of potatoes will vary depending on how many people you want to serve, but my general rule is 2 potatoes per person -- who ever complained of too many mashed potatoes?? Anyway, put enough water to cover the chopped potatoes, place lid on top, and bring to boil on the stove.

Meanwhile, wash the kale, and give it a rough chop. I also remove the stems since they are sometimes tough. Remember that kale shrinks when it cooks, so I'd allow a generous handful of raw kale for each person. Also rinse and slice a couple of mushrooms, keeping them separate from the kale (serving for one, I used 2 button mushrooms).

Get out a good heavy iron skillet, wipe with an oiled napkin or paper towel -- not so much oil that it pools in the bottom, but enough to make the pan shiny. I use vegetable oil since it will be getting very hot. Heat the oiled pan for a few minutes on medium -- it will get very hot. While the pan is heating, this is a good time to check on the doneness of the potatoes, and get them ready to mash.

Drain cooked potatoes (poke them with a fork to test doneness) in a colander, then dump into the bowl of your standing mixer. Add salt, pepper, and butter to taste -- when the potatoes are very hot like this, they absorb more flavor. Begin mixing on a low setting, then add milk a little at a time, gradually speeding up the mixer to whip the potatoes. Adjust seasoning, and keep in a warm place.

Now, put the steak(s) into the hot cast iron skillet -- it will sizzle. Allow to cook 2-3 minutes on each side, getting nicely browned, but not overcooked. After flipping the steaks, get started on the kale.

In a separate saute pan, heat a little drizzle of olive oil with a sprinkle of red pepper flakes. When hot, throw in chopped kale. It will sizzle and pop, especially if the kale is still wet, so beware. Stir kale quickly so it does not scorch. Once it begins to wilt, add chopped garlic to taste. Stir rapidly in pan, and add some salt. Do not brown the garlic. Add a splash of water towards the end (about 1 tbsp.), toss it around in the pan, and turn off the heat. It will be bright green, very garlicy and delicious.

Steak should be done cooking by now. Remove it from the iron pan, season with salt and pepper, and cover to keep warm. With heat turned down low (or off), put a pat of butter into same cast iron skillet, let melt, then throw in sliced mushrooms, with a little salt and pepper. Stir lightly and allow mushrooms to cook. When they are cooked, add some milk to the pan, bring up the heat, and scrape all the pan drippings into the gravy. Test the seasoning -- may need a little extra salt.

Now that everything is ready, serve steak next to a mound of mashed potatoes, top with mushroom gravy, and serve kale alongside. Serve with red wine of choice. This was awesome.

My New Life

So, it's been quite a while since my last post.. mainly because I still don't have internet service hooked up at my new home, but also because I've just been really busy in general. December was crazy.

Just to be clear about locations, I will henceforth refer to the place I moved from as City A, the place I moved to as Small Town, and my Christmas destination as Back Home. I officially moved on the 18th, went to my new place in Small Town to unpack for a few days, drove back to City A to stay with my boyfriend for a night (though that part was semi-unplanned) and fly out of the airport there for Christmas the next day. I arrived Back Home on the 23rd, stayed there for Christmas, flew back to City A on Dec. 30th and spent New Year's with my boyfriend. Then I drove back to Small Town on the Saturday night before starting my new job on Monday, January 4th. Phew! Since then, I have been very busy at my new job -- which I love, by the way -- in addition to unpacking and settling into my new home, and keeping tabs with Guy #3.

Now for the details.. prior to my leaving City A for my move in mid-December, things were going well with Guy #3, but not overly serious... we had not even discussed what would happen after my move, so I was unsure of things and a little nervous in general. When I drove back to City A to catch my flight for Christmas, I had made arrangements to stay at my old apartment for the night (sans furniture) and just leave in the morning.. but things turned out a little differently.. I had talked to Guy #3 a little earlier that day when I was leaving Small Town on my way back to City A, and we planned to meet up for dinner after I had run a few errands in the city. Dinner ended up being a little later than we had planned (maybe 8:30ish), which was fine, but then we ended up having a really nice time at dinner (this cute little french bistro) and hung out there for a while.. we went back to his place so I could get my car, went inside for a minute, and never came back out.. that was our first "sleep over", and admittedly, I was a little surprised. I was not expecting that to happen, and he took such good care of me.. making me comfortable in his apartment, getting up early to drive me to the airport, etc. We kept in touch the whole time I was Back Home, and talked a little about what we might like to do for New Year's. I again had made arrangements (talked to my landlady about using the extra bed above her art studio) to stay at my old apartment, not really sure of how things would go when I got back and prepared to move on to my new life in Small Town. He picked me up from the airport, and I ended up staying the entire time (4 days, 3 nights) at his place. Everything was so easy. And, one might think that spending that much time together all at once might be a little much, but it wasn't. We were perfectly amiable the entire time, even when we were just hanging out making breakfast or watching TV.

He took care of everything. Even though he proclaims himself to not know anything about cooking, over the course of my visit, he made me french toast, attempted salmon (though we weren't home on-time to eat it on New Year's Eve), made chili.. and he had prepared in advance.. bought us champagne and glasses, plus had remembered my favorite cereal and bought that for my visit as well. On New Year's Eve, we went downtown (where I was helping to coordinate the parade), met up with some of his friends for drinks, had a few snacks at the bar, and had planned to return home and have dinner before going back out to a couple of New Year's parties. We didn't end up leaving the bar downtown until about 10pm, got back to the house and ended up having snack/party foods with champagne while watching the countdown on TV and cuddling under a blanket. We decided not to go to any parties, got a little fizzy from the champagne and just went to sleep. I think it was one of my better New Year's experiences in recent memory -- certainly better than last year, which is a whole miserable saga in itself..

I woke up the next morning to the smiling face and happy new year's wishes of Guy #3, who is now officially my boyfriend. He made me french toast, and I made the eggs.. we had a lazy morning before going off to his friends' house for a casual afternoon gathering (I think so his friends could approve me), and had a nice time, but didn't stay too long. Not that we had anything else pressing to get to, but we just wanted to spend all of our time together. That is pretty much how my entire visit went. On the day that I had to leave for Small Town, I kept tearing up. I tried not to, and it even makes me a little watery to think of it, but it couldn't be helped. I seem to always tear up at the thought of us parting. We delayed it as long as possible, but eventually I had to go. He snuck outside to scrape the ice off my car and packed me dinner and some snacks for my arrival while I was getting everything ready to go. He really might be the perfect man.

Since then, it has been very hard being apart. He has been to Small Town for one visit so far, and is coming again on this coming weekend. I will be in City A for Valentine's weekend. His last visit went as perfectly as our time together in City A. He told me that he thinks he is falling in love.. and I think I am too.. it's just sort of scary at this point because everything has moved so quickly and I already have such strong feelings for him. I question myself, and wonder if the whole thing is just a fantasy that would never last if we were actually living near each other and saw each other more often.. but I think I could see myself living out the rest of my life with him very easily, and very happily. And he even commented last time he was here.. "I think I could make you very happy."

My job is also going great so far -- my coworkers (all 3 of them) are all really nice and fun to work with, and I really feel like a valued part of the team. Though I still have a lot to learn, I am enjoying being in a position where I am learning so much and getting to flex my brain a lot more instead of just taking orders and being bogged down with work like my last job. They actually listen and value my opinion, and I value them too. It is really nice. I can honestly say for the first time in several years -- I love my job! It was definitely the right decision to come here. My only sticking point has been with my boyfriend. I miss him. I do love my job, but if things continue to progress as they are with Guy #3, I think I will want to live closer to him. I'm not sure what we will/would do about this, but I'm just going to put it out of my mind for now.. the important part is that I love my job, and am dating a man who makes me happy.